So i have been pondering on what 2 blog and then it came 2 me, why not blog about me for a bit.? after all in order to love my heart u must know it right?
this is so cool 2 me because i love 2 journal....i started journaling in 1994 when i moved 2 Las Vegas Nevada. it was my only outlet for what i had been through.
I mean losing a parent in ur teen years is a nightmare and i had lost my mother physically at this time and i was waiting for God 2 hear my prayers and get
her up out of that nursing home bed and come back 2 me and save me from myself....
when i say save me from myself i meant it...i became pregnant when i was 16 and ended up in Dodge City, KS living with my oldest sister and her kids.
i was not too out of control physically at the time but in my heart and mind i was spiraling down....how do u live life as a teenage girl without ur mother and be happy?
i couldn't find an answer 2 my own question...
after living with my sister a bit, going 2 school, connecting with a few ppl that i now love and admire, and establishing myself in my new home i gave birth 2 my firstborn
on Oct. 5, 1992....she came early of course and was a tiny little thing...but today she is a new high school graduate and on her way 2 college...I ended up leaving Dodge City in
1994 2 move 2 Las Vegas with my sister and her family....I lived in Las Vegas Nevada for about 5 months before i ended up moving back 2 Dodge City just in time enough 2 see
my mother alive and breathing one more time and then a few weeks later laying her 2 rest...however i don't want 2 leave out a key person of my life...while in Las Vegas i met
the man that is now my husband...at that time i had no idea i would be his wife...but strange things happen....so we buried my mother Oct 31, 1994 by this time my babygirl was
2 yrs old now and i had a hunch that i was pregnant with my second child. And i was not at all ready 2 be a mom again...i was only 18 and it seemed that everyone that i loved
was either leaving me or dying....you know how dramatic u can be when ur a teen...Anyways once i buried my mother it was official i had 2 move on in life mommy wasn't coming
back 2 save me from myself...so i thought who would??? naturally when u suffer any type of loss u seek God for guidance, hope, and a means 2 go on in life...so i read my bible, prayed,
and waited for my directions on what 2 do with my life....and i got them just not the way that i thought it would all go down.
Anyways in Nov. of 1994 i moved 2 Gillette, WY and i have been here for 16 years.....i can tell u that where i am today was literally not in my plans..but that hunch i had about the 2nd
pregnancy well that baby boy was born on June 9, 1995 i was 19 ugh! can u believe it? and then i became a wife at the age of 20 on April 26, of 1996. only 2 find out 2 months later that
i would be a mommy for a third time...man was i upset and in deep denial! my 2nd baby wasn't out of diapers yet and that is not what i wanted...but it was too late the seed had been
dropped and planted...so i gave birth 2 my 3rd baby it was another boy on Feb. 9, 1997...and i made the decision then that if i didn't do something 2 stop the reproduction process in my
body i would be with another baby before i could catch my breathe...
there u have it in the smallest version i can give it...i am now still in Gillette, WY and those 3 kids i mentioned are 18, 16, and 14 now...and that marriage im still in well we have stuck it
out for 16 yrs....but no one ever knows what the future holds.....stay tuned in the near future for more Nuggets of my life....
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