Priceless

Nineteen years ago no one prepared me 2 be a mother...I had no idea the journey I would take with my firstborn....I was 16 when I conceived her(not recommended by the way) and was completely overwhelmed when I found out I was pregnant. I knew I wasn't  ready 2 be a mother at such a young age... But now as I look back  the only thing I would change is my age when I conceived her...I wouldn't even change who she was conceived by because if I did that I wouldn't have the priceless jewel that I have now. I would have a different one. And after the journey she and I have taken I wouldn't want a different jewel then the one I have now....There are a lot of things I wish I could go back and redo, but when it comes 2 my children I see them as perfect, unique, and divinely created 2 share a small part of their lives with me... I can remember almost every moment with her as though it were a movie...Fortunately for me it is apart of my memory bank and I can make withdrawals any time I need a reminder of how precious the moments with her were for me...On October 5, 1992 I gave birth 2 a very preemie baby girl! I named her Antonia Shanel. She was 4lbs and had 2 be in an incubator for the first 2 weeks of her life...I didn't even get 2 see her til she was 2 days old and didn't get 2 hold her until she was 3 days old...I had no idea the power of the mother child connection at that time...I say this because in those 3 days my high blood pressure spiked up and she refused 2 eat during that time...It wasn't until they allowed her 2 hear my voice and be in my arms did she begin 2 eat for her nurses and my blood pressure returned 2 normal...After what the 2 of us had been through during her delivery I guess we just needed 2 make sure we were both ok...Isn't that just amazing?? I think so...Through out the years we have went through it...And it is a lovingly long story! Which I won't take u through cause remember it is a memory I can replay at any time...Now I must prep myself 2 send her out 2 explore her life without me and let me tell u if u haven't been through it u have no idea the emotional wear and tear letting go can take on a mothers heart...I am grateful that she wasn't one that was so ready 2 leave home and start her own life right away..She was very gracious 2 her mother and stayed one more year...and I don't actually know if it was for me but it sure feels better for me 2 see it that way...the reason I titled this blog as Priceless is because that is literally the meaning of her name...I had no idea names had meanings I was a teenager I wanted something that sounded neat and was different from the norm. I didn't know I was actually giving her a name that would fit her perfectly...My daughter is Priceless I will miss her dearly but she has given me more reason then one 2 smile on her achievements...She didn't really crossed the line 2 much as a teenager and for the most part was very obedient...Still today she respects and honors her parents...I could go on and on about the Priceless jewel that God blessed me with...but if u don't know her u just wouldn't understand just how Priceless she really is....So here I go in 6 days my Princess will be leaving home 2 learn how 2 be an adult without MOMMY! yes my baby still calls me mommy....And I am strong now but u may want 2 ask me how I am doing next month...I am about 2 officially be the only female in my home! so keep me in ur prayers or shall I say keep my hubby and 2 sons in ur prayers?  If u know my daughter be sure and get ur see ya laters in...we don't say Goodbye in our family...we say see ya later....